Tuesday, October 1

Today I ache & pray for 4 small children.

2 little ones joined us a little over 3 months ago. During that time 2 separate family members were taking the steps they needed to become certified to take them.  (They are in another state so the process takes a while.) We recently learned that one family member is very close to completion and so 2YO boy could soon be on his way. Unfortunately, the home for the 1YO girl has now closed and so, while we have no idea of her future at the moment, she will continue to stay with us for now. We are very thankful that little guy can go to be with his family, but we are grieved that now these 2 siblings will be split up, even more so that they have 2 other siblings who are already with other family members.
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The last 3+ months have been challenging, really challenging. Not only the physical exhaustion of caring for 4 (4 & under), but the emotional exhaustion of guiding forward the 2 that were learning to live life in a new environment.  There have been many days where I didn't think I could possibly handle one.more.day.  But God's grace has, as always, carried us each day. And we are especially mindful of the prayers of those around us and so thankful for the grace extended through them. As I have often waited for the words with great anticipation, "leaving day", it's hard to believe that through the struggles, love has also been born in a way I didn't think possible.  
And so today I ache & I pray:
For 2 small children that were born into a home that could not provide the love, safety, & structure that each child desperately needs.
For 2 small children who didn't even recognize their blood sibling (we don't really know why), but who now greet each other with joy. We don't know if/when they will see each other again.
For a young boy, who for quite a while called both our kids "Graham" (haha!), but might not see them again.
For a little boy who greets me with "mommy!" and does a little dance in the morning and will now be facing yet a 3rd mommy in his life. We desperately pray this one will be final.
For a little boy whose only experience with a loving, hands-on daddy might only be this brief 3 months in his life.
For a little girl who's favorite word is "knock-knock" accompanied by giggles and she doesn't even know why.
For a little girl who came to us with the scariest blank stare and whose angry eyes have been replaced with learning how to laugh & giggle.
For a little girl whose future is so unknown. For whom I fear she may be one of those who flourish and grow in a long-term foster home only to be taken away by a court system who demands family re-unification even if it's been 2 years.
For 4 small children who have grown accustomed to life with 4 crazy siblings and will soon be saying goodbye to one.
For a little boy who will be leaving everything he has grown familiar with and grown to love and will be starting over with all things new.
For our own boy who asks, "why can't we just adopt them?" and has begun introducing them as his brother and sister, even though we talk frequently about their temporary stay.
For our own little girl who really doesn't understand the process and will be saying goodbye to her "twin" who we have seen her grow to nurture and love.
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I ache & I pray for a world where sin has left small children without their families.
But most of all, I hope and I trust in the grace of a Sovereign God who holds all things in His hands. Without that assurance, we have no hope!
Waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for himself a people for his own possession who are zealous for good works.
Titus 2:13-14